Others of us were not meant for this path. They were born to challenge everything, question everything, want to know, need to know, gain everything, lose everything, be rejected, be dejected, be depressed, be at a loss, be lost, go explore, fight the system, improve the system, create a new system, stand alone, be alone, go somewhere and find an identity, get destroyed, leave our country, return and change our country. This message is for all, but it is to this second group to which I would particularly like to appeal.
My father once told me: sometimes we have to light a fire to change things. He told me this as I was learning what it is to be a man, and I will never forget these words. Before I even began to think about where life would take me, it seems my father already knew. Because, like my father, I belonged to this second group, and was born to stand apart, to suffer alone, and to challenge things. He knew life would be rough; he said it, I thought it cliché. But he knew that in this life, nothing ventured is nothing gained. He knew that life could yield the most bountiful harvests and bestow the most lavish gifts, but he also knew that there would be times that by virtue of one’s very nature, unendurable pain would have to suffered.
I’m not one to preach. Far be it from me to tell what life should or will be like. I can only relate experiences. I am young, but I have tirelessly sought experience. And I have found it. I have prospered, and I have ventured, and I have been battered, and I have been sent back home. I have been blessed. I have been seen through situations solely by idealism, confidence, and what my mother calls ‘a mother’s prayer’. I have also found myself mired on life’s rocky shores among other broken vessels like myself. I have risen to take my place, but I am yet to board the sweet chariot that will take me home to the golden shores awaiting those among us who will dare to take the road less travelled.
Life has brought me to a point – I have been hardened and sharpened; I have been filed and fashioned into a blade. I have become a razor’s edge. I now look for something to cut. The path I travel is yet again a different one; I must find a new way. And I wait…
Yet you, you are different. You, to whom those before you must now defer, will rise and take their place. You do not yet know the jewels you carry within your breasts; the gems that are your minds; the miracle-workers that are your hands; or the sword and shield that are your unyielding attitudes. You have often been ridiculed, ridiculed others, excelled, been lonely, felt different… foreign. You have not much been taught by those who understand you, by those to whom you can relate. You have been pressured, criticised, ostracised, and left wanting. You hunger in a way that few others seem to understand, and you need as few others do. You have wondered why not conformity? Why not quiet, controlled ascent to this world’s common comforts. Why you?
Let me be the first to tell you: welcome. You are not alone, you never have been, and henceforth, will feel so no longer. Those who came before you have waited, patiently and knowingly in the quiet, waited for you to come of age… waited to explain to you, nurture you and teach you. Those before you well understand the meaning of difference. Not all are willing to support you, not overtly, but all stand, willing or unwillingly, beside you. Those like you, who could not help but dwell apart, now stand and watch, mesmerised by the beauty and strength you possess. They too have felt the yearnings for more, have tasted the fruits of their own labours, and relished the glories of their own victories. But they have known hurt, pain. Some utilise it, and continue along the path; some cannot bear it, and lay beaten with former glories in tow. All now look to you, with the pride of a father and the love of a mother, and know why you are special. They silently cheer for you, quietly encourage you, and wait patiently to help carry you over. They, in their quiet way, heap their hopes and their dreams, aspirations and fears, unto you… and they love you. It is these gifts and burdens you bear, these feelings that pressure you. And it will be these things that drive you.
I am not far before you, but I would like to give to you this message. I have but few words, and fewer experiences… yet I would like to speak to you as some of you have never been spoken to before. I would like to leave with you these few words that will hopefully help you along your path, as I follow mine. Before slipping into the shadow ranks of those who were once like you, and those would see you take your places as kings and queens in this world, I would just like to say:
Remember, first and foremost, you are never alone. Though you may not always see your help, it is always there when you need it most.
You are not the first, and you will not be the last. You are destined for greatness, yes, but so are others. Wait your turn, settle for nothing less than you desire, and you will be rewarded. Rob another of his chance and forever live in fear, knowing you have forfeited your own birthright.
Remain confident, not arrogant. Be proud, not haughty. Challenge everything, but accept that which you cannot change. Be sceptical, not cynical. Live hard, die well. Remember clichés became so for a reason. Know that amazing lies inside you, regardless of what you think; believe in it, and there will nothing stopping you but yourself.
Love passionately. Know that while fairytales are beautiful thoughts, they remain stories for a reason. Give yourself wholeheartedly to whomever you love, but bear in mind love is compromise. Think of people as puzzle pieces – each has his excess and recess. It hurts when the pieces to the puzzle don’t fit, but the right piece will help you see the big picture.
Dream boundlessly. You are so great a force that the only thing stopping you is you. Disregard naysayers and those who would mock your dreams. Imagination is a tool; use it. Nothing ventured is nothing gained, and those who dream the biggest are rewarded greatest when it all comes to fruition.
Live without regrets. Every experience, good or bad, will inform how you proceed tomorrow. You alone know how much you can bear. You alone are responsible for your actions. Do nothing that will compromise who you are fundamentally, and you will be able to look at yourself in the mirror without pangs of remorse or disgust. Learn from everything, waste no time thinking on what could or should have been, only what you will enact into being. Regrets only weigh you down, learning helps you soar.
Be your best ALWAYS. When you are content with who you are, nothing can disturb your peace of mind. There will be better, and there will be worse than you. The only way to find equilibrium is to be your best for yourself. You will fail at times, you will at times stray. It is in your nature to question and experiment. Sometimes you will reach a positive outcome, other times you will not. Only you can put yourself back together when it all falls apart. It will be hard, but stay focused and you will find a way. Finally, I will not lie to you – you will plan well, but when things go awry, as they invariably will, you will hurt. But bear in mind pain is inversive – it helps you to know that bliss must be on the other side. Learn from it, grow, and one day when you have gained the world, remember from where you started. Then you will take your place among those who have come before you."
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it was very inspirational reading your post. thank u for posting it ... i don't think there is alot of people like you but knowing u and others like u exist... means a lot.
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